Chapter 23: Angry At The Disease

I am angry at the disease depression and I need to put the reasons why in writing.

I am tired of:

having withdrawal symptoms from every psychiatric medication I have stopped taking.

having side effects from every psychiatric medication I have started.

having to wait 4-8 weeks to see if a medication is going to be effective.

needing medications that are expensive.

having a psychiatrist who tried 15 different drug combinations in a year and a half with few results; and then didn't support me after I went to the Amen Clinic for help.

"traditional psychiatrists" using an educated guess in determining which medication would be effective for me.  They decided after hearing my list of symptoms.  Other medical fields look at the organ they are treating.

letting things I need to do just sit. 

having everything I do take so much effort.

having to put my life on hold because I don't feel like doing anything. 

having thoughts that come from a brain not functioning correctly, not from anything real.

having things that were important to me lose their value. 

not having any energy. 

not finding pleasure doing things I used to enjoy.

not feeling well enough to attend activities.

my body not creating enough neurotransmitters on its own.

people I love having to deal with this disease.

having a genetic predisposition for depression.

not having advanced medical care in the treatment of depression where I live.  I needed to go to another state.

families and friends losing someone they love because of suicide.

depression causing extreme misery.

available technology not being used with every patient it could help.  SPECT Brain Scans and the research that goes with them gives a psychiatrist more information to diagnose and treat psychiatric disorders.  The Amen Clinics have been using this technology for about 10 years.

Information from, The UltraMind Solution, by Mark Hyman, M.D.

Taken from pages 11 and 12; book published in 2009

• Psychiatric disorders affect 26 percent of our adult population or more than 60 million Americans.
• More than 20 percent of children have some type of psychiatric disorder.
• More than 40 million people have anxiety.
• More than 20 million people have depression.
• One in ten Americans takes an antidepressant.
• The use of antidepressants has tripled in the last decade.
• In 2006, expenditures on antidepressants soared to over $1.9 billion.
• Psychiatric disorders like depression and anxiety are expensive.  They are among the top five most costly medical conditions, including heart disease, cancer, trauma, and lung disorders.  The cost to our health-care system exceeds $200 billion a year, which is over 12 percent of total health-care spending.
• Alzheimer's disease will affect 30 percent (and some experts say 50 percent) of people over eighty-five years old, which is the fastest-growing segment of the population.  It will affect 16 million people by 2050.
• Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder is a label we now give 8.7 percent of children between the ages of eight and fifteen.
• More than 8 million, or one in ten, children now take stimulant medications like methylphenidate (Ritalin).
• Autism rates have increased from 3 in 10,000 children to 1 in 166 children--an elevenfold  increase--over the last decade.
• Learning disabilities affect between 5 and 10 percent of school-age children.
• The indirect costs of all these broken brains to society are mammoth.  They include loss of productivity at school, home, or in the workplace, accounting for a loss of over $80 billion a year. 

Thanks for reading.  My heart goes out to everyone who is angry and tired of depression!

Chapter 20: Acupuncture, Relaxed Wanderer

The needles were thin and I could barely feel them go through my skin.  She used them on many parts of my body and I had some on my face; above my nose and on my forehead.  She was treating my depression symptoms and for pain in my lower back from a herniated disc.  I laid quietly listening to the music and completely relaxed.  It was a restful, rejuvenating experience.  After the half hour quiet time she came in, removed the needles, and rubbed Dragon Balm (an external analgesic) on my skin.  The balm was warm and then cool and the scent was invigorating.  (Dragon Balm can help relieve a headache.  I rub a small amount on my temples and it helps soothe the pain away.)

After my first acupuncture session I felt calm and looked forward to seeing if I would be able to come off antidepressant medication and feel good without it.  I had researched treating depression with acupuncture on the Internet and there were many case histories of it being successful.  I started lowering the dose of my antidepressant and began taking a combination of herbs called Relaxed Wanderer Formulation.

My first acupuncture appointment was in the month of July.  I was lowering my antidepressant dose extremely slowly because I have experienced withdrawal symptoms from every psychiatric medication I have stopped taking.  My acupuncture sessions were relaxing and enjoyable for about three months.  Then I started to notice my thinking was changing and I wasn't feeling as good.  Two more herbs were added to my regimen and I don't even remember what they were.  I started to write down how I was feeling and what I was thinking.

I no longer looked forward to my appointments.  The half hour quiet time seemed long and I felt anxious for my provider to come back into the room so I could leave.  I was hoping these feelings would pass and the acupuncture itself, and the herbs would begin to work.  I lost the desire to do things I usually enjoyed, things that were important to me lost their value, I felt tired and irritable, and began feeling I had never accomplished anything in my life.  These are depression symptoms for me, and I knew the acupuncture and herbs weren't working.  Soon after, thoughts of suicide plagued my mind and I knew I needed to go back on the antidepressant.  That is what I did the first part of December.

I was disappointed acupuncture did not help my depression symptoms, but I felt fortunate the antidepressant worked for me after going back on.  My doctor had warned me that for some patients the antidepressant doesn't "kick in" after restarting it.  Fortunately, acupuncture did work on the pain in my lower back.  After 4-5 treatments per month, for 5 months, my back was pain free.  It was agile and felt back to normal.  That outcome was welcomed! 

It was fascinating at first to feel the symptoms of depression returning.  I observed my thinking slowly changing.  Other things in my life during this time hadn't changed.  Without the help of the antidepressant the disease gradually took hold again and within five months the disease was in control.  By December the fascination had changed to misery!  The results of this experience did not talk me out of trying the amino acid therapy many years later.  At this point, I believe I will stay on antidepressant medication long term.

Last Friday morning I made the move up to 150 mg of Effexor XR.  The gradual rise of the dosage has seemed slow-paced, but I am still not feeling any side effects that are strong enough to bother me.  I was taking Effexor several years ago and the side effect of nausea never went away.  The medication was effective on my depression symptoms, but the nausea was constant and irritating so my doctor changed my antidepressant to Zoloft.  

My psychiatrist at the Amen Clinic believes I had a problem with nausea because I started on too high of a dose, and increased it too quickly.  I am relieved I have not felt nauseated.  I am taking approximately 19 mg of Luvox twice per day.  The tablets are getting smaller and smaller.

Normal Day, Please Hasten Your Arrival!

  

Chapter 18: "Fulfillment, Peace, Life in all its Fullness."

Sixteen days on Effexor XR, seven of them on the higher dose of 75 mg in the morning.  I decided to not lower Luvox quite so quickly.  I am taking 25 mg in the morning and 37.5 mg in the afternoon.  In three more days I will increase Effexor XR to 112.5 mg and lower Luvox to 25 mg on both doses.  I have had short periods of time where I feel the depression symptoms are lifting.  I am still not feeling side effects or withdrawal, which is a huge positive!

I am still hopeful.  I am trying to take life a day at a time.  Prayer and faith in my Higher Power to give me direction are sustaining me.  Listening to Eckhart Tolle every day helps me stay focused on the Now, not spending much time in the past or making up a possible future.  Chapter 8 in, The Power of Now, A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment, Tolle explains what he believes salvation is.  

"True salvation is fulfillment, peace, life in all its fullness.  It is to be who you are, to feel within you the good that has no opposite, the joy of Being that depends on nothing outside itself.  It is felt not as a passing experience but as an abiding presence.  In theistic language, it is to 'know God' --- not as something outside you but as your own innermost essence.  (I believe this is my spirit, which Tolle calls the inner being.  I believe my spirit is a literal offspring of my Higher Power.)  True salvation is to know yourself as an inseparable part of the timeless and formless One Life from which all that exists derives its being.

True salvation is a state of freedom --- from fear, from suffering, from a perceived state of lack and insufficiency and therefore from all wanting, needing, grasping, and clinging.  It is freedom from compulsive thinking, from negativity, and above all from past and future as a psychological need.  Your mind is telling you that you cannot get there from here.  Something needs to happen, or you need to become this or that before you can be free and fulfilled.  It is saying, in fact, that you need time --- that you need to find, sort out, do, achieve, acquire, become, or understand something before you can be free or complete.  

You see time as the means to salvation, whereas in truth it is the greatest obstacle to salvation.  You think that you can't get there from where and who you are at this moment because you are not yet complete or good enough, but the truth is that here and now is the only point from where you can get there.  You 'get' there by realizing that you are there already.  You find God the moment you realize that you don't need to seek God.  So there is no only way to salvation:  Any condition can be used, but no particular condition is needed.  However, there is only one point of access: the Now.  There can be no salvation away from this moment.

There is nothing you can ever do or attain that will get you closer to salvation than it is at this moment.  This may be hard to grasp for a mind accustomed to thinking that everything worthwhile is in the future.  Nor can anything that you ever did or that was done to you in the past prevent you from saying yes to what is and taking your attention deeply into the Now.  You cannot do this in the future.  You do it now or not at all."

Fulfillment, peace, life in all its fullness ... a state of freedom --- from fear, from suffering, from a perceived state of lack and insufficiency, wanting, needing, grasping, and clinging ... freedom from compulsive thinking, from negativity, and above all from past and future as a psychological need.  This is what I want.  I am getting better at Living in the Now everyday.

Chapter 17: Effexor XR, ADHD & Viral Meningitis

I have been on 37.5 mg of Effexor XR for 9 days and I feel the same.  This is a good thing!  I have not felt any side effects or withdrawal symptoms from lowering the dose of Luvox.  (Or at least not enough to notice.)  I will go up to 75 mg of Effexor XR tomorrow morning, and lower the dose of Luvox to 25 mg in the morning and 25 mg in the afternoon.  I am hopeful!

I think it was my last post I mentioned the new psychiatrist in my city that supports my trip to the Amen Clinic.  I think I told you how AWESOME he is.  :)  He discussed an interesting possibility with me.  I was diagnosed with ADHD from the results of my brain scans at the Amen Clinic.  I feel I have had ADHD for the past 2 1/2 years, but not my whole life.  My doctor was a teacher and researcher at a university before he recently went into private practice.  The research he was involved with indicated there is usually something that precipitates the onset of ADHD later in someone's life.

He asked me if I had a brain injury, or a major illness such as encephalitis or meningitis.  I said no, but then I said wait a minute, I may have had meningitis.  In February of 2003 I went in to the emergency room on a Friday night with a severe head and neck ache.  They gave me morphine in an IV for the pain and said it could be meningitis, but I didn't seem sick enough to warrant a spinal tap (lumbar puncture).

By Sunday morning the pain in my head and neck was excruciating; I had never felt anything like it before.  I may have passed out more than once as my husband drove me to the hospital.  I was in such bad shape I was admitted immediately into the emergency room, no waiting!  :)  The fluid in the spinal tap was negative for bacterial meningitis.  My white blood count was extremely high, but they couldn't find a specific cause of the infection.  I was given morphine through an IV that whole day and sent home Sunday night.  The possibility of viral meningitis was never mentioned.

The next four days I took a combination of prescription pain killers.  I could barely get out of bed and had no appetite because of nausea.  I could not tolerate any light and had to keep my room dimly lit.  By Wednesday of that week I could no longer tolerate the pain.  The pleading with my Higher Power changed in content from asking for help, to asking if this was the time for me to die.  I had never been so sick and I asked my Higher Power if death was going to be the outcome, "Could we do it now?"  If I had a choice I wanted to stay to finish raising my sons, but if that wasn't part of the plan I was ready to "move on".  I remember feeling surprised at how simple the decision was.

Thursday night as I went to sleep I was planning on asking my husband to admit me to the hospital the next morning. Friday morning I woke up slowly and realized the fever had broken and food sounded good.  I believed recovery was possible and I felt blessed.  Full recovery took another week.  Now I believe I had viral meningitis.  This inflammation in the membranes around my spinal cord and brain may have made me more vulnerable to ADHD.  Interesting!  Here are the symptoms and the differences in meningitis and encephalitis if you would like more information.  

Taken from:

http://www.ehow.com/facts_6186800_difference-between-meningitis-_amp_-encephalitis.html

Difference Between Meningitis & Encephalitis

By Anjus Chiedozie, eHow Contributing Writer

I want to do this! What's This?

Meningitis and encephalitis are two medical conditions that involve inflammation, thus the suffix "itis." Despite their similarities, meningitis and encephalitis are not quite the same.

Description

1. Meningitis is an inflammation of meninges, which are membranes that envelop the nervous system, particularly the brain and spinal cord. Encephalitis is an inflammation of the brain itself.

 

Causes

2. Meningitis usually results from either viral or bacterial infection. Encephalitis is usually caused by viral infection.

 

Symptoms

3. Symptoms of meningitis and encephalitis include high fever, seizures and headache. Additional symptoms of meningitis include stiff neck, vomiting or nausea with the headache, and sensitivity to light. Encephalitis-specific symptoms include hallucinations, tremors and loss of consciousness.

 

Treatment

4. Bacterial meningitis is usually combated with intravenous antibiotics. People infected with viral meningitis or encephalitis usually require substantial fluid intake, over-the-counter pain medications and lots of rest for treatment.

 

Prevention

5. Bacterial meningitis can be prevented by maintaining a healthy lifestyle and avoiding instances that can put you in contact with bacteria. Viral meningitis and encephalitis can be avoided by immunization, and preventative measures include keeping away from major viral agents such as mosquitoes.

Read more: Difference Between Meningitis & Encephalitis | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/facts_6186800_difference-between-meningitis-_amp_-encephalitis.html#ixzz0u5llOx3N

Chapter 15: Clonazepam The Beast, Effexor XR

During the past month since I posted on my blog I have been trying to eliminate the withdrawal symptoms from clonazepam (generic for Klonopin).  I have not made much progress!  The main symptom being extreme anxiety. Starting Wellbutrin also increased anxiety.  On the fourth day the anxiety was so extreme I did not take anymore.  I took regular Wellbutrin, instead of SR or XL which was what my psychiatrist at the Amen Clinic recommended.  I think that was a mistake!  I was disappointed, but I didn't want to try Wellbutrin again!  The anxiety makes my body feel like it is going to explode from the inside.  This feeling is a new one to me, very uncomfortable, and I am weary!

I was first prescribed clonazepam for the anxiety caused by the antidepressant Zoloft.  I did not feel anxious until I started on the medication, and the anxiety was mild.  There was evidence at this time of clonazepam causing scalloping on the brain and of it being highly addictive.  There was also evidence the anticonvulsive class of drugs helped with anxiety.  My psychiatrist at the time didn't know this information about clonazepam (or maybe he didn't agree with it), but he helped me recover from a major depression more than once.  Now I want to come back to the "present" and not spend any more time in the past.

One bright spot in the past month was talking to my psychiatrist at the Amen Clinic by phone on June 16.  He was happy to hear I had been off clonazepam for over 5 weeks.  He was positive and supportive and boosted my spirits.  He reminded me what an accomplishment it is to be off this drug!  He said I had been on clonazepam for so long it could be causing depression!  He recommended I wait until my body had been free of the drug for 8 weeks before we decide to change or add medications to my treatment.  I did add 5-HTP, also known as oxitriptan (INN), a naturally-occurring amino acid, chemical precursor and a metabolic intermediate in the biosynthesis of the neurotransmitters serotonin and melatonin from tryptophan.  I will talk to my psychiatrist again on July 7 after being off the beast (clonazepam) for over 8 weeks.

I have not noticed any difference in how I feel after adding 5-HTP, except maybe a little nausea.  I am ready to take the next step in my treatment plan, adding Effexor XR.  This is what my treatment plan from the Amen Clinic says about Effexor XR:  "At low dosages, Effexor XR will help anxiety, depression and obsessive thinking, and at high dosages will help ADHD symptoms.  An antidepressant with action at multiple receptor sites, Effexor XR will enhance prefrontal cortex function and decrease anterior cingulate and limbic hyperactivity.  Effexor XR has a starting dosage of 37.5 mg daily, increasing by one every 7 days as tolerated, to the therapeutic target dose of 75 mg to 350 mg.  It should be taken with food to avoid upset stomach.  Effexor should not be stopped abruptly because it has been associated with a discontinuation syndrome in some patients.  At higher dosages, blood pressure should be monitored.  If Effexor XR causes more irritability, I would increase the anticonvulsant to stabilize the temporal lobes, enhance mood stability, and decrease anxiety or irritability."

I was on Effexor (not Effexor XR) about 10 years ago.  The nausea it caused didn't stop, so I changed to Zoloft.  The problem with nausea could have been caused by going on the medication too quickly.  This time I will increase the dosage more slowly.  I experienced the discontinuation syndrome mentioned above when coming off Effexor.  At this point, I expect to be on an antidepressant for the rest of my life so I am not concerned about discontinuing the drug.  I will need to lower the dose of Luvox as I add Effexor XR.  I have a positive attitude and will discuss the treatment plan with my psychiatrist next week.

I am ready to have a normal day not based on surviving!  "Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are." (by Mary Jean Iron)

Chapter 12: I Hate Clonazepam, Supplements

I have been off clonazepam for 10 days.  I would not want to go through the withdrawal symptoms without the help of Neurontin and the supplements recommended by my doctor at the Amen Clinic.  Going off the drug caused increased anxiety, irritability, and not being able to sleep as well.  I went back to taking 300 milligrams of Neurontin four times a day.  Increasing the dosage from 1200 mg a day to 1500 mg a day made me so dizzy it was hard to function.  If the anxiety gets too uncomfortable, I open a 300 milligram capsule of Neurotin, put a little bit in an empty capsule and take it.

These are the supplements that have been extremely helpful to me:

Restful Sleep: Serving 4 capsules   4/bedtime
Vitamin B6 10 mg, Magnesium 100 mg, Melatonin (immediate release) 2.5 mg, Melatonin (controlled release) 2.5 mg, Valerian 600 mg, GABA 100 mg.

Neuro PS:  Serving 1 capsule   2/bedtime
Phosphatidyl Serine 120 mg, Phosphatidylcholine 72 mg, Phosphatidylethanlamine 54 mg, Phosphatidylinositol 30 mg.

Brain Vitale:  Serving 2 capsules   2/morning
Acetyl L-Carnitine 500 mg, GlyceroPhosphoCholine (GPC) 200 mg, Inositol 200 mg, Phosphatidylserine 120 mg, GinkgoSelect Phytosome 90 mg.

I have continued with the diet changes I talked about in Chapter 7.  I am also taking the supplements Dr. Mark Hyman recommends in his book, The UltraMind Solution.  I believe giving my body the nutrients it needs will help it heal.  This is what is included in the The UltraMind Solution Essentials Kit.

Multivitamin/mineral, ProThera, MultiThera 1 Capsule Formula: Serving 6 capsules
2/breakfast  2/lunch  2/dinner
Vitamin A 10,000 I.U., Vitamin C 750 mg, Vitamin D3 800 I.U., Vitamin E 400 I.U., 
Thiamine 50 mg, Riboflavin 25 mg, Niacin 100 mg, Vitamin B6 25 mg, Folate 800 mcg,
Vitamin B12 200 mcg, Biotin 300 mcg, Pantothenic Acid 150 mg, Calcium 250 mg,
Iodine 150 mcg, Magnesium 250 mg, Zinc 15 mg, Selenium 200 mcg, Copper 2 mg,
Manganese 10 mg, Chromium 200 mcg, Molybdenum 150 mcg, Potassium 50 mg,
Boron 2 mg, Vanadium 100 mcg, Choline 100 mg, Inositol 25 mg, para-Aminobenzoic Acid 50 mg, Citrus Bioflavonoids 100 mg.

Calcium/magnesium, ProThera, OsteoThera Capsule Formula: Serving 2 capsules
2/breakfast  2/lunch  2/dinner
Vitamin D3 200 I.U., Vitamin K 200 mcg, Calcium 250 mg, Magnesium 100 mg,
Boron 0.5 mg, Silicon 3 mg.  I have an extra bottle of this formula delivered with my kit to get 1,000 milligrams of calcium every day.

Vitamin D3, Pure Encapsulations, Vitamin D3 1000 IU: Serving 1 capsule   2/breakfast
I am also taking a 50,000 I.U. capsule of vitamin D every month.  My vitamin D level is at 45, and should be between 50 and 80.  I am looking forward to warmer weather so I can be out in the sun more.  Too much vitamin D can be toxic, so it is important to have my level checked by a blood test every six months.

Methylation, Designs for Health, Homocysteine Supreme: Serving 2 capsules
1/breakfast  1/dinner
Vitamin B2 50 mg, Vitamin B6 50 mg, Nature Folate Blend 2 mg, Folinic Acid 400 mcg,
Vitamin B12 1000 mcg, Zinc 5 mg, Magnesium 10 mg, Trimethylglycine 500 mg,
Choline 100 mg,Serine 100 mg, N-Acetyl-Cysteine 100 mg.

Omega-3 fats, Metagenics, EPA-DHA Extra Strength Enteric Coated: Serving 2 capsules
2/breakfast  2/lunch  2/dinner
EPA 600 mg, DHA 400 mg sardine, anchovy, herring.  I have an extra bottle delivered with my kit because I am taking 6,000 milligrams per day.

Probiotics, Metagenics, UltraFlora Plus DF Capsules: Serving 2 capsules
1/breakfast  1/dinner
15 billion live organisms: 50-50 blend of Lactobacillus acidophilus & Bifidobacterium lactis Bi-07.

There are days this seems like a lot of supplements to be taking, but I am starting to feel small glimpses of feeling better!  Being sick has motivated me to give my body the nutrients it needs.  The UltraMind Solution is a comprehensive guide to helping your body and brain be healthy.

Mark Hyman, M.D. states the following in his book, The UltraMind Solution.  "The most powerful tool you have to transform your health and improve your mood, mind, and metabolism is your fork!  Use it well and you will thrive.  Choose poorly and you will suffer."

"The varied components of a whole-foods diet not only taste better, make you feel better, and prevent disease, but they are literally medicine.  Mounting scientific evidence points to the power of food as medicine.  These "medicinal" foods are simply the foods our bodies evolved eating---fresh, unadulterated, slow-burning, high-fiber, vitamin- and mineral-rich, omega-3 plentiful, and phytonutrient-dense foods."  (Chapter 14, page 292)

"Think of nutrients as fertilizer for your brain.  Think of them as little helpers that improve communications and connections.  In a perfect world, no one would need supplements.  But given the stress of our modern life, the poor quality of our food supply, and the high load of toxins on our brains and bodies, we clearly need a basic daily supply of the raw materials for all our enzymes and biochemistry to run as designed."  (Chapter 15, page 304)

How to Optimize Your Nutrition for Vibrant Health

The path to better health is simple-and agreed upon by almost all scientists. In this week's UltraWellness podcast, Dr. Mark Hyman explains how to optimize your nutrition and which supplements are crucial for vibrant health.  This podcast is very good and I'm sorry I wasn't able to embed it in the post.

http://www.youtube.com/profile?user=ultrawellness#p/search/2/QNX--ZqCOQU

Chapter 11: My Brain Scans; Outside Surface View

Getting off the drug clonazepam is brutal! Clonazepam is the generic name for Klonopin, and is in the benzodiazepine family of drugs.  They are sometimes called benzos for short.  The last time I lowered the dose it brought me down to .03125 of my original dose of .50 at night.  This time the withdrawal symptoms did not subside in 2-3 days, they persisted. 

After having a headache, slight nausea, a strange dizzy feeling, and increased anxiety for a week, I increased the dosage of Neurontin.  I am now taking 300 mg of Neurontin three times a day and 600 mg before bed. The main side effect of Neurontin (for me) is a dizzy feeling; so I am just more dizzy now.  Increasing the dose of Neurontin has decreased the anxiety, and the other withdrawal symptoms as well.

The supplements recommended by the doctor at the Amen Clinic are also helping.  (Refer to Chapter 10 for more details)  I take Restful Sleep and Neuro PS at night and they have helped me continue to sleep well.  Adding the extra Neurontin capsule at night also helps me sleep. Taking Brain Vitale in the morning seems to help with anxiety.  Luvox, Neurontin, and the supplements are making the withdrawal tolerable.  I would hate to do it without them!

I am hoping in the next two weeks the side effects of Neurontin will be over, and the clonazepam withdrawal symptoms will have stopped.  If this happens, I am going to stop taking clonazepam.  I am anticipating a spike in anxiety when I do this.  If this happens I can increase the dosage of Neurontin again. 

Being addicted to clonazepam gives me more compassion for anyone addicted to anything!  I want to get off clonazepam because it is causing scalloping on my brain. This scalloping shows I am not getting the blood flow I need in those areas.  It is hard to remember the reasons to quit when I feel sick day after day and know if I took a little clonazepam I would begin to feel better.  It is a hard place to be.

Here are SPECT scan photos of the outside of a healthy brain.  These are scans of the top down surface and the underside surface of the outside of the brain.  These are 3D Surface renderings, looking at the top 45% of brain perfusion.  (Perfusion means injection of fluid into an artery in order to reach tissues.)  A normal scan shows full, even, symmetrical perfusion.

These are my SPECT brain scans of the outside of the brain during concentration.  The scalloping is circled in white. The scalloping on my brain is mild and should heal after I am off clonazepam. The scalloping holes mean cerebral blood flow and metabolism are poor in these areas.  It does not mean my brain is missing in these scalloping holes. After the scalloping heals my brain will have better functioning capabilities.

These are my SPECT brain scans of the outside of the brain during rest.  The scalloping is circled in white again and you will notice an object has been put in one of holes to show how deep it is.  I think it looks like I put a Mentos candy in my ear and it went to my brain. :)

          

                             

Below are three examples of more severe scalloping and the causes.  These scans are taken from a poster made by Dr. Daniel G. Amen.  They show a 3-D surface view of the brain, acquired by SPECT imaging, looking at cerebral blood flow and metabolism.  I think these scans are fascinating and intriguing!

                                                                                                                                                                 

                                                          

Chapter 1: Depression, Amen Clinics, Amino Acids

I was hit with postpartum depression after the birth of my first son in 1981. I am 56 years old, and my name is Kathy. If you have experience with depression, my heart goes out to you with compassion.

I recently returned from the Amen Clinic in Newport Beach, California. I first saw Daniel Amen, M.D. on PBS. He was talking about the brain and taking SPECT (Single Photon Emission Computed Tomography) scans of the brain before prescribing treatment for depression and other psychiatric diseases. This was interesting to me because I knew my brain wasn't functioning correctly, and I had been suffering with treatment resistant depression for about a year and a half. Having more information to base treatment on sounded like a good idea to me! I did not have much hope left for feeling well again. Find out more at:  http://www.amenclincs.com/.  This is what led me to the Amen Clinic.

Daniel G. Amen, M.D.:

On December 7, 2007, I started lowering my dose of Zoloft, and began taking amino acids to treat the depression. The process was going well until the day after Christmas. Withdrawal symptoms of nausea, headaches, and anxiety were powerful. I decided I had lowered the dose too quickly and increased the amount of medication.

During the months of January through May 2008, I felt withdrawal symptoms as I slowly cut the Zoloft tablets into smaller pieces. The amount of amino acids taken by most people to help them feel better was not effective for me. I took a urine sample out to the main FedEx Shipping Center (FedEx Kinko's could not accept this package) and it traveled to a lab out of state.

After we received the lab results, my amino acids were changed and increased. This process of urine samples, lab results, and change in amino acids happened several times in those five months. There were many times I questioned what I was doing. I felt sick, but I was so far into the therapy I had to see if it was going to help! Towards the end of May I was off Zoloft and the withdrawal symptoms were ending. It was hard to get the 24 pills of amino acids down each day, but they were working on the depression symptoms.